Because I Love Him - By Anoni

" I'm standing by him because I love him." I hear those words a lot on prison visits. I believe the women who say those words too. But I often think about their partners in prison. Is the love there for the women who travel for hours to see them week in and week out? I'm not judging anyone here, far from it. I'm just weighing up the situation because I'm struggling to understand it. I queue to visit my man like the rest of the families on prison visit day. Some of whom I speak to outside the visitors centre when I go for a crafty cigarette. One girl in particular always seems to pull on my heartstrings. Sometimes I feel like putting her in a bag and shaking her up - but I can't judge, because I have a partner in prison too. The girl is quite young. In fact, I'm old enough to be her mother! She always looks stressed and tired. But who wouldn't having to occupy a toddler whilst waiting to see our loved ones. The wait itself is enough to drive adults around the bend! She told me it was her boyfriends 4th time in prison. She also told me she doubts he will ever change. So my question was, " So why stand by him if he isn't prepared to change?" Her answer was, " because I love him." But does he love her? If he loves her, then why does he continue to offend? Why would he choose to be behind the Queens walls and not at home with his girl and his child? Is this a one way love thing? Because 4 times in prison tells me that the old saying, 'learn by your mistakes' hasn't worked. I shouldn't judge, but what happens if my old man re-offends? This is his first time in prison - hopefully the last because I am not enjoying this prison journey at all. If he chooses to go back to prison, then what respect has he got for me?