Dear PFV. I have been reading some posts on your site about maintaining family ties. Personally I think it is all about getting the balance right. My son is in prison and he has been in prison four times. During every sentence I supported him both financially and emotionally. Some people might disagree with what I am going to say next, but looking back I think I mollycoddled him too much.
He had everything on a plate apart from his liberty. He had money, letters coming in every day, regular visits, stamps, clothing and footwear and basically everything he wanted he got.
This current sentence he is serving I have decided to knock a lot of what I do on the head. In a strange way I felt like I was 'rewarding' him for being in prison because looking back again, he actually got more money, clothing and footwear from me and the rest of the family than he did when he wasn't in prison!
I absolutely agree with the other families who have posted their views about where do you actually draw the line? Maintaining family ties I do agree with but how far do we go? Is providing our loved ones with everything they want in prison a good thing? No I don't think it is and as long as I keep giving in, I do not see a future for my son in the respect of going on the straight. Prisons should be places where people do not want to go back to, but people are going back time and time again! I still support my son, but I feel it is time now that I took a step back to actually let him reflect on what he is doing.